A woman goes through changes when she is growing older, her mouth forgets to button up and she just grows much bolder.
It starts when she hits fifty or there or thereabouts, she starts to act quite different and don’t mention growing stout.
She used to be an angel with patience by the bucket, but now she doesn’t care at all and often says “oh **** it.”
She suffers from hot flushes that make her glow bright pink, she splashes on cold water in cup fulls from the sink.
Her mood swings like a yoyo from gentle sweet and mild, to a full blown volcano she can be very wild.
And then there are the whiskers that start sprouting on her chin, she plucks them out with tweezers and throws them in the bin.
She can be quite forgetful it’s all par for the course, but please don’t say you’ve noticed she may hit you with full force.
And she might get quite sweaty in the middle of the night, but don’t try and awake her or she may give you a fright.
Her hair might now lack lustre and may look rather dry, if she asks you what you’re thinking It might be best to lie.
And if you’re feeling amorous please approach her with great care, because if she has a headache she’ll accept that as a dare.
But please try not to worry it’s just a passing phase, it’s only for about five years until you get better days!